TIB-0047: the origin of davos
where business class met god complex
classification: open secret
source reliability: high (unfortunately)
compiled by: toast bureau of investigations (tbi)
summary:
the world economic forum wasn’t born out of kindness. it was born out of boredom, bureaucracy, and a very specific kind of european insecurity.
in 1971, a young klaus schwab (freshly returned from harvard and kissed gently on the forehead by henry kissinger) decided europe needed its own corporate think tank. america had the management conferences, the cia had the coups, europe had.. cheese.
time to balance things out.1
phase 1: the “management cult” years (1971–1986)
note: original drafts contained optimism. optimism removed during review.
the first meeting in davos wasn’t about saving the planet. it was about teaching european executives how to act more like americans.2
behind the scenes, the goals were simple:
align european industry with the western bloc
keep the soviets appropriately nervous
maybe sell a few ski passes
they called it the european management forum. very exclusive.
very beige.
phase 2: rebrand and expand (1987–2000)
the cold war cools. the champagne warms. schwab rebrands to “world economic forum” and swaps “management efficiency” for “global vision.”
suddenly every politician, banker, and self-described “thought leader” wants an invite.
the messaging shifts from “profit” to “purpose.”
translation:
same people, new powerpoint template.
phase 3: the “stakeholder era” (2000–present)
now davos is less about managing companies and more about managing you.
they call it stakeholder capitalism: the idea that corporations should run the world but also tweet about empathy.
it’s where the same five billionaires meet every january to discuss how the rest of us should live sustainably…
on less.
intel assessment:
origin motive: western corporate unity under friendly branding
current objective: soft governance without elections
key vulnerability: ski lift malfunctions, wi-fi outages, public awareness
one early analyst attempted to describe davos as “a symposium of benevolent elites.”
that analyst has since been reassigned.
unofficial field note:
observed:
elevated confidence among attendees
correlated with altitude and champagne intake
toast verdict:
the wef is essentially a networking event that accidentally turned into a shadow government.
it started as a business workshop and evolved into a religion for technocrats.
their first miracle: convincing the world they’re the good guys.
previous internal drafts labeled this “mostly harmless.”
correction: it is neither.
action items:
keep thoughts non-compliant
remain uninvited to davos
carb-load. resistance requires gluten
end of document.
file code: TIB-0047
prepared on: equipment not rated for this task
success of this balancing effort remains unclear.
effectiveness remains unverified.